I haven’t been posting a lot, and I have mainly posted about my artwork.
For those who want to know about what’s going on in my life, I will be short but will try no to omit anything important (to my humble opinion).
I’ve been working a new job and everything was fine until, after my dear friend’s death, I experienced transference to one my co-workers. She felt overwhelmed and embarrassed by my over emotional attachment towards her so I ended up in tears and she stopped talking to me for a while. I needed a one-week sick leave to recollect myself. I eventually went back to work with a healthier state of mind and less emotional behaviour so she started to talk to me again, we no longer joke together like at the very beginning but it’s better this way.
My goal for now is to do my best at work working part time, use my free time to draw and do some journal wrecking, and prepare for Xmas in the best conditions.
I apologize to those who follow me for the lack of posts these last weeks. I have been busy with trying to find a new job that fits both my abilities and disabilities. I also have made another step towards independence since I will soon have my own flat. I need to see my physiotherapist on a regular basis due to my right groin pains but I won’t complain much about it bc the treatment is massages and they are quite pleasant. 🙂
Those who want may also follow me on
I know, it’s been a while, almost one month. What’s happened?
Well, my friend with the brain tumor had to be hospitalized because of her new treatment. She texted me she was out and better a few days ago. Phew. I was really scared.
My former teacher on Facebook doesn’t want to answer any of my private messages or comments anymore. I felt sad, I cried, I felt a heavy weight on my chest…no explanation. I did all I could to reach out to her, but it’s no longer up to me. I have to accept the situation.
I have started taking singing lessons! I did so when I was 15, but I decided I had to train and practise again with someone qualified, and she genuinely thinks I have some potential.
I’m seing Mr Handsome (my physiotherapist) for massages after suffering from groin and back pain for months.
I have another job in sight, part time, other workplace.
In other words, life goes on!
Bad dreams in which I’m back to work
Colleagues are angry, nothing works
I force myself to cope
But there is no more hope
I wake up unrested though I slept for hours
Where are my powers
I haven’t read a novel in weeks (actually I’ve been reading the same book about laicity, and how to apply it in the French society, schools and workplaces without offending religious people – very interesting).
I haven’t drawn anything in a few days and I need practising again or my ability will remain unimproved.
Work is going fine. But I can’t figure myself starting work early in the morning yet, so I need my medically required part-time to be carried forward for at least six more months.
Regarding my mental health, it’s fine. I haven’t really been depressed or anxious in quite a long time, except when thinking about people who seem to have let me down, but c’est la vie.
There’s been quite a lot of anxiety in my life these days. I can’t tell exactly why. Strangely (and fortunately), it is not about work; on the contrary, I’m glad to have something to do in the afternoon other than spending my time in front of a computer.
On a positive side, I have continued to doodle for my personal satisfaction and welfare.
I wasn’t sure I would be able to draw a sketch a day for #inktober but it’s been 15 days now and I have my 15 drawings!
As for work, I had to make some things clear with the staff (like not giving me the same boring and repetitive task to do for half a working day!) and all seems fine now.
Windows 10 bugged so i can only use my mobile to blog. Today’s the end of my 1st working week after 2 years of health issues, recovering and healing and so far so good.
I should go back to work on Oct. 1st.
It would be part time on a first place.
I will be something between an archivist and a librarian, reading and filing newspapers, writing summaries and reviews and sharing them through the intranet.
I’m bored at home but going back to work after all the ordeals I went through is a bit scary. Everybody says it’s normal after all this time but I’ll be ok.
After almost 2 years of sick leave which reason I explain here I eventually helped as a volunteer at my parents workplace!
It was easy: filling administrative papers with the help of my mum but it helped me feel useful, busy and no more lonely.
Maybe I worked no more than an hour but it was a good kick start!