I should get rid of the scale

I am always gaining then losing then regaining then relosing about 5 pounds. It seems nothing but to me it matters. I am not going to talk numbers because it can be triggering to some readers. But I weigh virtually every day. I write down the weight on my paper log. I calculate how much I gain or lose or if I maintain. I love eating chocolate, pasta, cheese, tasty desserts…but when I become too close to a certain weight, oh, I do eat, but I try to reduce as much as possible the choccies, the carbs, fat and sweet. And I exercise, although I don’t like it much. Because the worst thing is not to attain “my” maximum weight. The worst would be to go over it and never stop.

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4 thoughts on “I should get rid of the scale

  1. Maybe getting rid of it would help but then there are other ways ones brain will try to control once the scale is gone, like measuring the cms you gain / lose on your hips and so on… Wondering when exactly people started to ‘feel’ the need of changing their bodies, it just would make everyone feel bad… whatever, you look great so dont let your brain controll too much of what you like!

  2. I have never measured myself and I have never wanted to. I tend to obsess specifically about the weight, but I also look in the mirror and check if I am not bloated/if my thighs are not too big/if I still have a waist. I was never diagnosed with any kind of eating disorder although I ate very little from age 16 to 23 (?) and my BMI was a bit too low but never alarming. One day I realized that undereating nurtures depression and I forced myself to eat 3 real meals a day. I felt better but the weight gain made me feel insecure, although I do know I am still rather fit for my size. Also I tend to want balance more than losing and losing more and more so I think this is rather sane.

  3. I feel your pain. :0) Except, for me, I’m always dancing around a 15 pound discrepancy. I never associated myself before with an eating disorder, because for it to be a “disorder”, the person needs to believe that. That doesn’t mean that a starving person (who does that intentionally) doesn’t have a legitimate disorder, it just means that if they believe they don’t, then they “don’t”. Sure, there’s a lot of room for error in that line of thinking, but faith is a powerful thing! Hindu Yogis go for weeks without so much as a drop of bread for increased spiritual enlightenment; but if a teenage girl or boy does that in the U.S. he or she’s “sick”. See what I mean?

    So yeah, I think that our own perceptions have everything to do with what is and isn’t healthy, and when it all comes down to it, it’s really up to each of us to determine what is and isn’t healthy for ourselves. I don’t like being 20 pounds overweight; in fact, I hate it. But a lot can be said for acceptance too. Would I rather have the endless battle of waging war on my own happiness because I’m not as thin as I’d like to be? The stress of that can be just as damaging as being a smoker, you know? Seriously. So, self-forgiveness goes a long way with me. 20 pounds isn’t enough to do more damage to my heart and vital organs than my own stress (of wanting to be thinner) can do. Love yourself I say, and accept what you can’t immediately change. 😉

    I hope 2016 brings you all the desires of your heart: whether than be losing 5 pounds or another slice of cake! x

  4. Thank you for your comment. Actually most people with a disorder are in denial and yet they do have a disorder. What I know is that contrary to anorexic people I see myself as skinny when I’m skinny (anorexics always see themselves as overweight even when they are dangerousely underweight). My BMI is fine. I just want to be fit, healthy fit. I don’t want to start gaining and never stop. I want to maintain. And it sucks when the scales displays 5 pounds too many. That being said, I too wish you a happy new year! 🙂

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