I’m stuck at home with the dog. It’s hard for me to go out except to take her for a walk because I feel like I’m not walking out alone (which is actually the case – I have my dog with me).
Those dreams haunt me every night: I’m a college student but I fail at everything and my schoolmates are harsh with me. In real life, I obtained my Degrees. Or I’m at work and I’m overwhelmed by the red tape. In real life I’m still on sick leave.
I’ve had panic attacks again.
And also, I keep thinking about “my downfall”. What if I had remained disabled? What if I was very badly handicaped? I mean not only being unable to walk, but even worse!
I have always said my life was shitty, at least since I was 12, but nowaday I surprise myself thinking – and believing! – that I am so lucky.
My back hurts once in a while and my right groin is painful when I cross my legs or lifts my right leg to get in the car. But I’m fine. Really. I’m lucky.
Don’t want a Marine Le Trump as my president.
So glad to practise my English with my mum’s lovely long term British penfriend!
Pity she only stays for a week.
I don’t wanna write about how sick leave is still necessary and the thought of going back to work disturbing (aka nightmares).
I have nothing interesting to write about home alone days reading or watching videos.
So here are four outfits from the first four months of the year.
From left to right, clockwise: angel with sneakers, automatic drawing, another automatic drawing, mermaid
Bad dreams in which I’m back to work
Colleagues are angry, nothing works
I force myself to cope
But there is no more hope
I wake up unrested though I slept for hours
Where are my powers
Here I am home alone again on sick leave.
Work has been tough, mainly because of workplace relationships which I will not go into detail.
So I keep myself busy not being busy. I play with and walk the dog, surf the WWW 90% of the time, watch Netflix and do a little artwork.
This is my first painting on canvas in years. I am not really good at painting on canvas but here we go.
Ok I used a Gif maker online but the drawing is all made by me with only a mousepad on Paint. Back to the 1990s guys!
I remember a time when we started to use computers at school but couldn’t surf the Web (this shows my age :p ).
So I liked to open Paint and draw with the mouse pad. It was very very hard.
Today I decided to try again in an impulse of nostalgia and love for the 90s.
So here’s my first mouse pad drawing of 2017.