After agonizing about my friend’s health whilst not getting any contact with her, I eventually managed to join her on the phone yesterday. She’s entered a new medical protocol that seems to have been working so far, so fingers crossed.
As for me I’m getting in touch with friends again: my BFF and I met in my hometown a few days ago and on thursday a girl friend I met like 10 years ago on the WWW who I haven’t seen for a while is coming with her boyfriend.
Today’s my birthday. I’m getting along with the fact that I’m over 30 and slowly, but surely, going on my 40s (although still in my early 30s).
Yesterday night my dog Jasmine swallowed toad venom. She vomitted and we were panicky. We called the vet who told us to give her a bath, wash her mouth with the shower head and to give her paraffin wax. Now we didn’t not have paraffin wax. it was 11 pm and no pharmacy was open. We called a vet center on night care to ask if they were willing to sell us paraffin for our dog. The vet on the phone was very kind and said that olive oil would work equally. Thanks God we had that! Jasmine is perfectly fine! Phew!
Back to my Bday; you know what was my best present? The friend/former teach of mine who I thought rejected me by not answering my text messages on FB wrote to wish me a happy Bday and explained she was just trying to spend fewer time on social media. Phew!
I think it’s going to be a good day.
I still have no news from my friend with a brain tumor.
Another friend stopped talking to me on FB’s chat room.
On the other hand, I talked with my best friend on the phone and he’s coming to see me tomorrow.
I saw Mr Handsome again, we couldn’t hug cos there were patients in the room but he sat very close to me and asked me how I was.
It’s roller coasters again. I prefer that to depression downfall but switching from well being to depression is nonetheless tiring and trying. Hope to have a stable mood.
I try not to focus on Her. I’ll wait till September to ask for news.
I focus on hobbies.
Mainly, I’ve been sketching stuff using only my imagination. It’s terrible to see how reductive the quality of my doodles becomes when I have no blueprint to take inspiration from.
But I’ve been reproducing things for too long.
The more I read Mars ‘blog, the more I try to draw out of the blue instead of copying another sketch, illustration or photograph. It’s really hard. The outcome is much less beautiful. But it’s MY OWN work!
These are doodles I did on my uni classes’ notebooks and I realized that I can actually draw not too bad things out of the blue without using a blueprint.
So, I’m gonna keep on practising.
It was my parents’ last day off today and I hope I’ll be able to manage staying home alone. Maybe I’ll go back to the thriftstore that is open on every Tuesday. Meanwhile I went to a yardsale where I found a nice small chest/bench and the jewelry you can see on the picture above (It’s not gold, but yeah it’s nice and cheap).
This blog eventually got over 100 followers and though it’s only a blog, I am happy that people around the world enjoy participating in my virtual life and keep updated about my real life.
I use the internet a lot to keep in touch with friends bc they live in various cities and traveling has gotten dificult over the years with my hindering anxiety. Sometimes I feel I can take the train, but most days I’m not brave enough.
Apart from that, I have had no news of my friend with a brain tumor and I keep telling myself that she’s just on holiday, and not meander into darker thoughts about her condition. Worrying won’t help, so why worry?
I keep sketching here and then with an alteration in the quality from one sketch to another.
I realized there are free websites to add a watermark to your own pictures and art and I gave it a try. Will probably choose something better. Meanwhile enjoy watching this ballerina.
I did my nails at last. Nothing much thrilling to talk about. I go to the sales and eat out from time to time. Haven’t been able to reach my ill friend for a while, I try to tell myself that’s she’s just on holiday.
I have bad dreams, some more pleasant, I have bad moods, then better ones, I’m just alive, that’s it.